BDSM is a contact sport.

Now, I know that you don’t want to think of your favorite quarterback on all fours, in leather cuffs with panties in his mouth (or do you?) but there are a lot more parallels between football and BDSM than you might expect. Aside from the love of unnecessarily sexy outfits and the constant ass-slapping, both are physically and emotionally testing for those playing, both are spectator sports (if you want them to be), and both can send you away with bruises, grazes and a sense of having been ravaged for a full 60 minutes. In addition, as with any other contact sport, there are safety precautions in both that must be taken to ensure that everyone’s still in tact after the session and is ready to play the next time.

Most of the time, BDSM doesn’t necessitate huge dudes in knee strapping and full body-tight lycra (although it does if you’re doing it right), but you still need to make sure you’re playing right, and with the right people (or an entire team, if you’re feeling particularly saucy).

Kink safety starts way before the first whistle is blown. Prep yourself and your play partners, and by that, I mean get your sexual health in check.

Look after yours and get tested regularly, because there is absolutely no possible way to make genital warts look sexy, and be sure that you only choose play partners that are open and honest about their own, and will engage in the conversation without attitude. If a player can’t pass the physical, they don’t get to go in the game.

Would you go to the Super Bowl with a team member that you wouldn’t trust to catch the ball? Of course not – and so don’t set yourself up for a BDSM marathon with someone who you cannot trust to do the right thing at the right time.

If you cannot trust a partner to stop when you say your safe word, even if it’s when they’re halfway through spanking you silly and smack in the middle of their own euphoria, then you shouldn’t even step foot on the pitch.

This goes both ways, of course; if you’re the one in charge of the situation, you need to trust that your submissive has told you everything about their health and mental state so that you can play without triggering a health or metal emergency – and if you can’t trust that, put your whip away and go home.

So you’ve done all the right preparation, stretched by the sidelines and made sure that your helmet fits correctly. You’re ready to play, and to play hard. But wait: do you know how to hit someone in a way that won’t leave them unable to walk for a week? Like making a tackle on the pitch, there are ways to spank, tie up and tease your partners that will make sure they don’t get hurt.  Whether you’re brandishing a whip, a paddle or just the palm of your hand, you should know in advance which parts of your sexy, vulnerable sub are suitable to hit, and which aren’t.

Fleshy bits like the buttocks and thighs are perfect for impact play; bonier parts like the upper front torso and the middle of the back are distinct no-go areas. Make sure you know the best way to play; no one likes to leave the pitch with a broken collarbone.

Football players have medics on hand to deal with any medical issues they might face, even if that emergency is as little as a cramp in the calf muscle or a slightly bruised ego. However, unless you’ve managed to commandeer a hospital ward for your nefarious means, it’s likely that you won’t have a medical professional on hand when you’re getting kinky – so YOU have to be ready to deal with anything that might occur. If you’re playing with rope, keep safety shears on hand to cut through ties in the event that your rope bunny loses circulation in their hands. If you’re whipping, spanking and caning like a Victorian schoolmaster, have Arnica cream and icepacks nearby to deal with whatever bruising and swelling may occur. And most of all, be ready to stop any sight at any moment if something isn’t right. Postpone the game if someone gets hurt; never try to keep on playing.

Kinky sex and BDSM play allow us to explore our most carnal desires, and to engage in the kinds of behavior that would make our grandmother’s keel over in shock. But, as with any physical activity, there’s also a risk – so prep properly, play hard but safely, and let yourself go in the knowledge that you’re doing the right thing.

You got this, champ!

About The Author

Lord Morpheous

Morpheous (Hons B.A., B.Ed) is a sex educator/author, photographer and kink consultant based in Toronto, Canada. His work is archived at the Sexual Representation Collection at the Bonham Centre for Sexual Diversity Studies at the University of Toronto, The Leather Archives of Chicago and the National Archives of Canada. He travels and presents across the Americas, Europe and Asia doing outreach to both academic and kink aware safer sex organizations.He is also the host of the world's largest single night public erotic Japanese Rope Bondage event during Nuit Blanche every year in Toronto, Canada.

 

 

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