No, it’s not the only reason people travel, but plenty of us head abroad emboldened by fantasies of hotter sex with the men or women (or both) of that country than with the men and women (or both) of the country one leaves behind. At least that’s what I anticipated when I first visited the States many moons ago on a two-month tour cross-country.

I’d memorized the menu: I would start with an Armani-suited wall-street banker from Manhattan, move on to a whole rodeo of cowboys throughout the Midwest before finishing off the feast with a surfer or two in Los Angeles (or a hot struggling actor). And they would all be much more fun in the sack than the soft potato-shaped, pasty-white Englishmen I had left behind.

Needless to say, the final delivery didn’t exactly match my order.

Now, while the Americans I slept with were probably on a par with their English counterparts on bedroom prowess alone, and were always very polite and courteous, there was on thing about them that turned me right off: They took themselves far too seriously.

Being a Brit, I dislike egos in my men as much as I do botulism in my omelette. And most of my American conquests had a love for themselves matched only by the love most British men have for beer and crap food.

While there have been subsequent examples to the contrary, all these years later I still believe this to be generally true: That although Americans are probably marginally better in bed then the Brits, they lack that vital sense of humor that makes the sex great. But mine, alas, is only one opinion among many. So, I decided to put this theory to the test by asking a guy and girl from each country their thoughts on this vital topic.

And the result: The consensus seems to be to go foreign.

US: Darlene Enriquez, barista

“I used to sleep with this Scottish guy. He was younger than me – he kind of looked like Renton off of Trainspotting. Taller. Thin. He looked like a junkie but he wasn’t. He just drank and smoked a lot. He was sweet and gentle and considerate. He was really nice. Most American guys, they kind of just want to sleep with you and not speak with you again, and that’s it. If I had to choose between both countries, I would go with the Scottish guy. He would have done anything I wanted him to, which is really sweet. He treated me like a princess, basically. Most American guys are not like that.”

UK: Camilla Huntington, TV presenter (name changed to save public blushes)

“The Americans are better in bed – without question. The Brits are a bit more conservative. Most Englishmen I’ve slept with do one thing only, and that’s literally two pumps and a jump and it’s over. Americans will get and fiddle around down there – they’re a bit more eager to please. I don’t know if it’s because I’m English, and most Americans are fascinated with the English. I don’t know. But I can honestly say that I’ve slept with a couple of Englishmen, and they’re, you know – passable. But on the whole, I would much rather sleep with an American.”

US: Humberto Gomez, racehorse exercise rider

“I would say the British are better. The Americans are more sentimental. They get too emotional, whereas the English just go for it. And I’m talking about one-night-stands here. You have to work too hard with the Americans – unless they’re drunk. The British on the other hand just like to have sex – if they like a guy they just go for it. They’re very sexual. Very open.”

UK: Stephen James, teacher (name changed to save job)

“Americans. American, American, American every time. And it’s down to the fact that us British are just so, how should I say it – stuffy. I always have way more fun with American chicks than I do with the British. Americans love us! And we can take full advantage of that. They’re more adventurous. They’re not inhibited sexually like a lot of British chicks. I dread the thought of ever having to return home. That would be the end of my life.”

 

About The Author

Danielle Rose

Danielle Rose emigrated from England to Los Angeles a number of years ago, where she is now based as a freelance writer. Bringing with her a unique perspective on transatlantic attitudes towards sex, Danielle has long believed that our sexuality should be celebrated, not smothered.


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